I was born in Lebanon and when I was two years old, I was severely burned in a kerosene explosion on Christmas night. I was the only survivor of the accident. Following the explosion, I was in a coma for six months and even after waking up, it took a while to regain my sight and hearing. It also took several years of physical therapy and multiple surgeries before I could walk again, and I was left with scarring on over 70 percent of my body.
Embracing my scars has been a challenging journey filled with tons of emotional ups and downs. I have a love-hate relationship with them. On one hand, they’re permanent reminders of such a terrible event in my life. On the other hand, they’re a reminder of what I’ve overcome in my life, and make me feel like a warrior.
For a long time, and sometimes even to this day, I struggle with my appearance. I often dread going outside because, unless I’m covered in makeup, people tend to stare at me. These looks are frequently accompanied by faces of disgust, inappropriate remarks, and even insults. It makes me want to curl up into a ball and become invisible.
I am strong, resilient, and powerful, and to anyone reading this who also wants to transform their marks, you are strong, you are resilient, you are powerful, too.
After experiencing this for most of my life, a few months ago, I decided that if people were going to stare, I would give them a reason to look at me. I’m in the process of tattooing all of the scars on my body. That way, people see my art and not just my scars. So far, I have tattoos on both arms, my chest, my neck, and a small piece on my thigh. My left arm, which was not burned, is fully covered in tattoos already, so I eventually want the rest of my body to match that area. It’s been a painful process — tattooing the healed burns is much more intense than non-scarred skin due to the I got second and third-degree burns I sustained from the explosion. With fewer layers of skin to work with, the pain is much more severe.
For anyone considering getting a scar tattoo, I say go for it. For me, it was about transforming a tragic reminder into something beautiful — an artistic expression that tells the story of my scars. My favorite tattoo is on my forearm and it says, “She conquered her demons and wore her scars like wings,” because that is exactly what I did. I turned a scar on my right arm into a dragon because people would often tell me how scaly my skin looked, but also because I, too, am a fire-breathing dragon. I am strong, resilient, and powerful, and to anyone reading this who also wants to transform their marks, you are strong, you are resilient, you are powerful, too.
— As told to Ariel Baker
Ariel Baker is the assistant editor for PS Beauty. Her areas of expertise include celebrity news, beauty trends, and product reviews. She has additional bylines with Essence and Forbes Vetted.