After my marriage ended, and I began to contemplate dating again, I read an essay by Colleen Crivello, in which she declared that people in their late 30s, 40s and beyond are “radically better in bed.” Compelling, right? And now after dating for the past five months… I think I agree? (Do you?)
For example, one night, a sweet guy came back to my house after dinner. It was our second date, and we talked and listened to music and made out like teenagers. At midnight, I walked him to the door. He said good night — and then gently but firmly pushed me up against my foyer closet and gave me the kiss of a LIFETIME. Like, Atonement vibes, you guys.
I’ve always liked to move slowly in relationships — preferring not to sleep with someone until I feel completely ready, and also savoring that early tension, which is such a fun part of dating, don’t you think? And I’m happy to report, I’ve gotten zero pushback. Instead, guys have responded so sweetly, like “There’s no rush at all” and “Your pace is my pace.”
One funny moment: While making out with a cute dad, we were both very into it; and he stopped and looked at me and said, “I know we’re taking things slowly, and I’m fully on board, but just to play devil’s advocate…” and we both started laughing. I’m laughing just typing this. After a grinding couple years in my personal life, dating feels so fun and fizzy right now.
So! The other day, on Instagram, a prompt was going around: “Quickly name 5 topics you can talk about for 30 min.” (What would yours be?) My answer included “make-out songs,” and a few people asked for recommendations. Today I put together a make-out playlist, if you’d like to try it out.
Thoughts? What would you add? I’d love to hear! xoxo
P.S. My sex mixtape, and is this the sexiest podcast?
(Photo by BONNINSTUDIO/Stocksy.)